Karma gets you pastry.

Twenty-five things for which I am thankful, in no particular order:

- Coffee mugs from California.
- My cellular telephone.
- My laptop computer.
- My favorite turquoise necklace.
- My zombie messenger bag.
- My imagination.
- Science Fiction.
- My ID badge that gets me into doors marked "Authorized Personnel Only" because that's a secret thrill even after five years.
- Scrapple.
- Secret corridors.
- Goofy action movies.
- Eggplants.
- My Kitchen-aide five-speed hand-mixer with milk-shake attachment. It probably has a proper title, but I use it for milk-shakes. So there.
- Hyphens.
- Punctuation in general, even if I abuse it horribly.
- My health.
- Words.
- People.
- Old Navy. It's actually a problem. A delightful, brightly-colored problem with clean lines and thoughtful design.
- My family.
- My dog.
- Music.
- My friends. Even the ones that make me want to pull my own hair out. They keep it interesting.
- Dark, hoppy beer.
- Ramen noodles.
- Love.

Obviously this is just a random assortment. I'm thankful for basically everything in my life, even the inconveniences and complications. It builds character, and I am all about character development.

***

EDIT: I've taken this story down in the hopes that I can get it published. Thanks for the wonderful comments on it, you guys are awesome.

Vacation follow-up

So, I didn't take a single picture, as I've mentioned before, but my friends did [and did well], so here's a peek at theirs:

Lindley's post and photostream .

And a picture of me reading [I did that a lot] by Don:

I call it "Creepy stalker photo in Sepia". I think it's funny, though. Jamaila talks a bit more about our doings on this post.

I can't get over how green and lush it was. I love Garrett County.

Thoughts on Twenty-something Singledom.

My cousin, Henry, is getting married this weekend. If his sister, Holly, marries her boyfriend after him, then we'll be going in birth order of the cousins. First my sister, then Henry, then Holly, and that leaves me before my younger cousins, Andrew [fifteen] and William [ten]. At least I have a few years.

Anyway, this wedding has got me thinking, mostly about being the free agent in a mass of couples. It's not as much of an enviable position as you would think, despite that they are all gracious in sharing their lives with me, and willing to include me in their day-to-day.

I don't have a vast and sprawling group of friends, but it isn't small, and it is certainly varied. And despite the different lives everyone is walking, I still manage to be The Single Friend [or Cousin...]. For everyone. No, really. Even if my friends are not romantically attached to each other, they are still paired off into their own functional units, whether it be with their roommates or neighbors or bff's.

Because I am now coming to be Of An Age where it's the natural way of my peers to pair off and settle down. Now is the time of weddings and babies and christenings. People I went to high-school with have families of their own.

So, I'm often at odds with myself. I savor my independence [such that it is owning a dog] and take great pleasure in answering only to myself. More and more often lately I've been wanting to strike off on my own [again] and find myself a little cabin in the woods that I can set up a forge next to and make metal things and write stories and have chickens running around in the yard. And maybe a goat. I'm flexible on the goat part.

But, I want babies. And an adult to cook for, and someone to be part of my functional unit, and romance and stupid, giddy love. So, where is my piece of the puzzle?

And yet.

And yet, here I am. Thinking. There was an e-mail going around a couple of years ago that talked about the quarter life crisis. Among other things, it highlights the battle of ennui and enthusiasm that we all feel when we're in our twenties. Snapping between wild confidence and crippling anxiety and the constant conflicting questions. What Next? What am I doing with myself? Who cares what I do? What will people think of what I do? I don't want to do anything with myself. I want to change the world. What the hell is wrong with me?

It's exhausting, and it's precisely the reason that I spend as much time as I do in my own head. Why I read constantly, or write this blog.

We don't want to inflict ourselves on the world, but at the same time, we're aching for it.

Or maybe it's just me.

<3

Beat the Flu Chocolate Mint Cookies

I work in a rather large medical institution, for a department that only treats the employees. With the recent Swine Flu hysteria, we've been making a lot of soothing noises and doing nasal-pharyngeal aspirates. The former to reassure that no one has the flu, and the latter to prove it.

Understandably, my colleagues are on the edge of our own hysteria, so I decided to boost morale and make cookies. That's my MO - When things get stressful, I bake.

Well! I was pondering this morning what I had, and I realized I was out of chocolate chips! Travesty! So I sidled over to Epicurious and did a search for "chocolate cookies". Well, there were many tempting results, but most of them demanded chocolate chips or sweetened chocolate – of which I had neither! Finally, I came across this little number. Bingo! I had all of the ingredients, and more importantly, it was quick and I had the time to do it.

Then, as I was assembling, I made some minor changes, so I'll repost the recipe with my alterations here. The over-all result was surprisingly light and cakey with a bright mint aftertaste, all without losing the darkness of the chocolate. We made a pot of coffee and took a moment to enjoy a cup with our cookies. I hope these go over as well for you as they did with my coworkers!

Beat the Flu Chocolate Mint Cookies
3/4 cup all-purpose flour
3/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
*1 tbsp dried mint flakes [once measured, crush into a fine powder in your palm, using your thumb. Who needs a mortar and pestle!?]

1 1/2 sticks (3/4 cup) salted butter, softened
*1/2 cup raw cane sugar
*1/2 cup light brown sugar
2 large eggs 1 teaspoon vanilla

Preheat oven to 375°F.

Whisk together flour, cocoa, baking soda, salt, and crushed mint flakes in a medium bowl.

In a separate bowl, beat together butter and sugar with an electric mixer until pale and fluffy, then beat in eggs and vanilla until combined. Add flour mixture and mix just until combined.

Drop level tablespoons of dough about 2 inches apart onto ungreased baking sheets and bake in batches in middle of oven until puffed and set, about 12 minutes. Transfer cookies to a rack to cool.

*A few notes: The original recipe called for 1 Cup of sugar. When baking with chocolate, I generally like to mix my sugars. I find that using half brown sugar makes a fudgy, rich taste. In this case, I had recently run out of granulated sugar, so had only brown and cane.

I added the mint flakes to fulfill a promise that they would be minty. V. glad that I did!

crafts!

Went to the American Craft Council Show today with Rosemary. IT WAS SO COMPLETELY AWESOME YOU HAVE NO IDEA. So much stuff! So much AMAZING STUFF. I ended up buying some wooden chopsticks and a matching little bitty salt spoon because I have no salt shaker [Ahem, Dad.] and generally end up filling a shot glass and putting it in the middle of the table at dinner parties. Now I'll have a SPOON, too!

Good Times.

I wish that I was a millionaire so that I could have bought some of the delightful things we saw. Gorgeous textiles!! I want all the scarves ever.

Also, I don't know if anyone has noticed, but Ralphie from A Christmas Story is in Iron Man. He's one of the scientists working for Obidiah to make the miniature Arc Reactor.

Don't believe me? Check this shit out: Peter Billingsley.

I've now watched Iron Man three times in two days. I think it's time to send it back to Netflix. I LOVE YOU, ROBERT DOWNEY JR. If you need a baby, I am your girl. I will birth them for you like a champ.

The End.

<3

The Oregon trail and other various and sundry.

Back from Portland! Had a delicious time with my sister and brother-in-law. The Chinese Gardens are FANTASTIC and I just wish they were bigger so I could have stayed longer and not looked like a crazy stalker. The weather was lovely, even if it snowed twice. Not too much rain, not too much fog. Crisp air. *happy sigh*

Here are some photos from our various excursions.

Bought several books at Powell's for super-cheap and I wish we had one here in Baltimore. Best. Store. Ever. Am currently plowing through the Wrinkle in Time series by Madeline L'Engle. HOW DID I MISS THESE BEFORE. I suppose half the joy of being an adult is the ability to go back and find things.

In other news: the sky is pooping out very pathetic snow. Not even snow, really. Moisture that has a tendency to be snow.

I don't really enjoy inclement weather, unless it's a thunderstorm in the middle of the summer. THAT is weather I can get happy about.

Anyway. Lester is doing extremely well, the little stinker. I feel like I shouldn't get all worked up when his body does something untoward, because he's sort of a miracle dog, and things always work out just fine in the end. Snaps his ACL? doesn't even limp. Congestive heart failure? He just pees it out.

I love my dog. He smells like Christmas right now, because I've been using this Natural flea and tick medicine that uses peppermint oil as its main ingredient. Delightful.

LALALA work happy hour tonight. Now that I don't drive to work, these little outings are much more enjoyable. :D

Happy Tuesday, y'all.

random thoughts for a cloudy monday...

people keep leaving umbrellas at my desk today. i can understand one being forgotten, but then there was a second and now a third. the second one is still wrapped in plastic, even.

i may have to make-off with the plastic-wrapped one, it's a jumbo wind-proof, and i like a big, imposing umbrella.

my friend Nina has herself a few vintage/antique umbrellas and uses them. i think that's neat; why collect something that is made to be used and then put it on a shelf? my favorite one of hers is a sharp navy and white polka-dot number with a graceful curve at the tip.

i don't even think it's raining at the moment, but i suppose one should always be ready. the only time i ever remember to carry an umbrella is if i am going to a job interview. don't ask me why, i think it is because a friend once told me i should look like i am well-prepared for such occasions. the rest of the time, i deal with the soggy hair and damp shoes. adds to my allure.

i want to be playing chess right now. weirdly. i just don't want to be working. i want to be napping. or reading. or dozing and reading. ooh, dozing, reading, and drinking a cup of tea. mmmmmmmmmmm, delicious lazy cloudy day activities. except i can't, because i am at work, and i've got to deal with all the douche-bag people that come in here.

and yet, i'm also a lot more apathetic than i used to be. i suppose.

lalala, new car-cakes. i'll be bringing the jetta down here after one more trip to delaware [the 'rents] to practice. i don't know why, but learning stick was really hard to do. i developed some kind of mental block against it, and i couldn't figure out how to get moving from a stand-still. it took the motivation of a sweet ride to break the barrier, and now i'll be able to cruise around town in my 2000 Volkswagen v6 jetta. although, there won't be much cruising, as gas is ridiculous. i foresee much shuttling to work in my future.

am reading a new science fiction series by Kage Baker. The Company. I just finished In the Garden of Iden, and it tore my heart neatly out and danced around on it for a while. achingly beautiful writing. the descriptions were delicious, and the character development perfect. Mendoza's transformation from jaded naivete to bliss to heartbroken back to jaded is astounding in its perfect reality and believability.