Happy things - January Edition

Things that are making me happy today:

water.
avocado.
Gold Bond ^tm ultimate healing skin therapy cream.
my shell necklace:


the internet.
my foot.
coffee.
my Craig Ferguson mug.
the letter P. perpendicular, preposterous, periwinkle, portly, pie, prologue.
this picture wot my Pops took.
beta fish [i wants one!].
science.

What about you lot? What's making you smile today?

I gots a tattoo, y'all!

Well, you all know about Ina by now. What you may not have known, is how important Astrology was to her.

She was born on July 14th, and was therefor a Cancer. We used to have long evenings of pouring over her Astrology books, reading about our birthdays and marvelling at the descriptions of us.

She wrote poetry, too, and some of her goofier stuff is located here, which she hadn't updated it since 2004.

Anyway, when I was thinking of tattoos that I would like to get, Ines came to mind, and then the idea of a crab for Cancer. As I thought about it more, I realized that, yeah, Baltimore loves crabs, too, and I love Baltimore.

And so.


[Done at the Baltimore Tattoo Museum, by Josh Griffin.]

I love you, Ina. Now you are under my skin. <3

First Spam!

I got my first spam comment, y'all! HOW EXCITING.

And for a female urination device, no less! I HAVE ARRIVED.

Brownies!

I made these the other night, and then bragged about them on Twitter. My pal, Meghan, requested the recipe, so here we go!

Brownies Cockaigne [Slightly modified from the Joy of Cooking recipe.] - 30 brownies, but you'll probably eat the whole tray that night, anyway.

1/2 C butter
4 oz unsweetened baking chocolate
4 eggs
1/2 tsp salt
1 C white sugar
1 C brown sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 C flour

In a double-boiler, melt chocolate and butter. Let cool.

Beat eggs and salt until light in color and foamy. [I often do this by hand, and it is pretty rewarding if you are feeling the need to let off some steam. Otherwise, a mixer works just fine.] Continue beating and gradually add sugar and vanilla until well creamed.

With a few swift strokes, combine cooled chocolate mixture into the eggs and sugar by hand. Before uniformly colored, fold in 1 cup flour.

Pour batter into a greased and floured 9x13" pan and bake for 30 minutes at 350 degrees. Brownies are done when toothpick inserted in center comes out almost clean.

Notes: For a fudgier brownie, I like to use half white sugar and half brown sugar. And for a holiday kick, try mint extract instead of vanilla. Recipe works really well with Bob's Redmill TM gluten-free, all-purpose flour.

I keep baking chocolate on hand at all times for the express purpose of whipping up a batch of these at a moments notice. If you ever come over to my house for dinner, chances are, these are going to be for dessert.

dreams in review.

the following are transcripts of my recent dreams as e-mailed or chatted to various friends after they occurred.

5/24/09, as e-mailed to K.

so there was this crazy kind of sea monster that was terrorizing swimmers on some tropical beach. so we were part of this elite task force that dressed up like the monsters [by wrapping ourselves in seaweed from neck to legs and then wearing a weird coconut hat. I NEVER SAID THIS MADE SENSE] and swimming around, killing the monsters with crazy knives.

and then we were getting out of the water, and i was naked for some inexplicable reason, and jaime hyneman was off gathering everyone's towels up, and so i went over to get mine, but it got caught on his head and we fell over.

the end.

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN.

7/26/09

R: morning chica
Me: i had really weird dreams last night
a sampling
R: oh?
Me: nina already had a baby a few days ago, and is now having a second
R: I'm sure she would be thrilled to hear about that one :)
Me: two: that i caught the baby, but couldn't put it on her belly because she was too far away on the bed
three: that she had the baby and i was feeding it cranberry juice
R: LOL
Me: four: that the priest who married my sister and brother left the priesthood so he could ask me out
R: ROFL
Me: five: that we were defending my grandmothers house from marauders, only they were really breaking in a few houses down.
six: i was crating lester in a window sill
R: like in a crate in a windowsill?
Me: no, like the window well of a basement window
R: huh
Me: i know
i only left him in there for a second
because even my dream self knew it was ridiculous
R: I love your subconscious so hard, even when it is weird.

11/4/09, as e-mailed to R and K.

i just woke up from a nap where I was dreaming that I was part of SG-1 [can you guess what i was watching before i fell asleep?] and there was a mission that was a little hazy, but i think we were swimming at some point and there were goa'ulds. Anyway, then we were eating lunch and i was piling all sorts of weird stuff on my tray and all I really wanted was pudding.

So. I'm going to make some pudding tonight.

11/23/09, as e-mailed to R.

last night i dreamed that I bought Cam a whole bunch of underwear [cotton boxer-briefs are cannon!] and t-shirts in super-girly colors. He was sweet about accepting them all, and then he noticed that I was wearing my M-9 [because i was totally on sg-1, duh] and he scolded me because we weren't on a mission.

I let him take it out of my holster [twss], and then we played catch in an alleyway behind my apartment building with a football. There may have been unnecessary tackling.

Then somehow he morphed into Jay Smooth, and he kept picking me up by my arm and leg and swinging me around in circles.

Bzuh? Totally posting that on my twitter to see if he responds. bahahahahaha

<3 happy monday!

12/15/09, as e-mailed to R.

last night, I dreamed that I went back in time to see my grandparents a year before my grandfather died and I accidentally let it slip that he'd be dead soon, and he just looked at me sadly and we went for a walk.

I remember hugging my grandmother and feeling like I was really tall and lumbering compared to her [which is accurate, because she was a wee slip of a thing.]

It was really. soothing, sort of. I was early to work, anyway.

There are millions more that I never wrote down, but babbled out to various people over the phone. Like the one where I was the leader of a band of survivors of the Zombie Apocalypse, and I was driving an SUV through a parade of Zombies playing brass instruments.

Or the one where I really had to pee, but couldn't find a bathroom that didn't have a group of people clustered around the toilet so I finally gave up and dropped trou in front of a bunch of strangers.

You know, the usual.

And never brought to mind...

Insert obligatory year-end reflection post:

So, 2009 kind of rocked. And it kind of blew. Which is, really, what I like to see in a year. I don't like all ups, because that means there will be too many downs later. I like a good mix.

A recap:

Lester went through his first bout of congestive heart failure, and gave me a few grey hairs in the process. Emergencies never occur at two o'clock in the afternoon on a Saturday, y'all. It's always four in the morning when you stayed up too late to watch random crappy videos on the internet the night before.

Anyway, then he got better, or at least we figured out how to keep him sailing on in his little furry body.

My pal Penny came to town from Seattle to see our intrepid Commander in Chief step into office, and we had a fantastic week kicking around. I ate a million pounds of Pocky.

Then I went and visited my sister and brother-in-law in Portland. I had the most marvelous time kicking around in one of the nicest cities on the planet. Like, really nice. Like, if Baltimore and Los Angeles got into a fight, Portland would be around to make sure we didn't kill each other and maybe make us cookies afterward. It was delightful.

Watchmen disappointed me, but it's cool. I forgive you, Watchmen. You were a good movie and all, but I'll take the book any day.

I met a dude, and we dated for a bit, and then we weren't dating anymore, and it's all gravy. It was basically the most casual thing in the world, and we're both so laid back that it was pretty much just one day we were hanging out and then another we were seeing other people. Easy peasy.

H1N1 hit, and my work life got CRAZY. I worked some overtime, and made cookies [that's how I cope] and I tried to keep my nurses sane. We got through it, obvs.

Then I had a birthday! It was lots and lots of fun, and my Dad and I spent that weekend driving all over Maryland for blacksmithing adventures. A delightful time was had by all.

My cousin got married! I had a quarter-life crisis! The world continued to spin unaided!

AND THEN SILAS WAS BORN. He is the cutest little blob of human that was EVER CREATED. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH I CANNOT STAND IT. I get to babysit for him on Saturday, y'all, and I cannot WAIT.

I had some strange dreams and went on Vacation. Garrett County is GORGEOUS, y'all, and I recommend it for a relaxing time away from reality. I WAS ON A BOAT.

Lester had an episode, but he's fine now, too. I guess I'll be on the lookout for those every six months or so. Crazy dog.

I did a guest post on Zaftig Chicks! My site traffic increased by maybe two people! Wooo!

And then Ina died, and it still kind of sneaks up on me every once in a while. I'll listen to a song that we used to love, or someone will say something that reminds me of her so much that I sort of space out and lose it for a minute. There's nothing in the world that can prepare you for something like that.

So, autumn kind of blew through in a haze of grief and sourness. I really tried not to be down, but when patients at work are insane and you're working long hours and the sun is steadily creeping away, it's tough.

And then Jesse and I helped that lady on the street, and things kind of... lifted. Maybe it was the rush of endorphins, or the knowledge that I did something right, or learning that there are other people in this messed up, glorious city that will stop what they are doing and pick you up off the sidewalk.

Whatever it was, I felt right again. I'm back in my own skin.

Then it snowed. A LOT. I hate snow. Then it melted, and then snowed this morning again, and I have a PARTY TONIGHT, dammit, and I refuse to kow-tow to the weather. IMMA PUT ON A FANCY DRESS AND LIVE IT UP.

So there.

Christmas was wonderful - I got to see my sister again and I missed her so much you have no idea. I got fabulous new toys [ipod touch omg omg omg] and drank some nog, and things are okay.

Tonight is going to be fantastic, and that's just all there is to it.

I love you, Baltimore. The world is great, too, but Baltimore has my heart forever.

<3

Pickled Rind and Fruit.

Today I found a treasure.

When my Grandmother's house was being emptied, I asked for one of her copies of The Joy of Cooking. My mother gave me the 1951 edition, where bacon drippings were a regular ingredient of corn bread, and you had to mix your own baking powder.

I was thumbing through it, looking up a recipe for macaroons, when I found a slip of paper tucked inside the pickles.

It was my Grandmother's notes, for 2 1/2 pounds.

2 1/2 C water
2 1/2 C vindegar
5 C sugar
7 1/2 in stick cinnamon
20 cloves

I don't know which recipe it was meant for, tomato catsup or corn relish or apple chutney. It may have been watermelon pickle or pickled peaches.

All I know is that it was written on the back of a dental extraction form [my grandfather was a dentist, though it's not from his practice.] and it smells like their house did.

Merry Christmas. <3

Ughhh.

this is my life right now. They had to plow THREE TIMES today, and it's still coming down.

I hate the snow. I work for a hospital, and therefor I don't get snowdays. If this doesn't improve by Monday morning, I'll have to hike to the bus in a foot of snow.

I DUN WANNA DO IT.

Thankfully, I've got SG-1 and tea [buckets and buckets of tea omg] and my dog is sleeping under the covers on my feet. Carry on.

blah blah twitter blah blah.

I want to blog, but I don't want to complain about my bad day, which is all I can think of to blog right now, so I'll just paste all of my tweets from the month of November instead. All I took out were my replies.

Oh, and I have no idea how to put this behind a cut. You're welcome. [eta: I totes figured out jumps, so you're welcome AGAIN.]

Karma gets you pastry.

Twenty-five things for which I am thankful, in no particular order:

- Coffee mugs from California.
- My cellular telephone.
- My laptop computer.
- My favorite turquoise necklace.
- My zombie messenger bag.
- My imagination.
- Science Fiction.
- My ID badge that gets me into doors marked "Authorized Personnel Only" because that's a secret thrill even after five years.
- Scrapple.
- Secret corridors.
- Goofy action movies.
- Eggplants.
- My Kitchen-aide five-speed hand-mixer with milk-shake attachment. It probably has a proper title, but I use it for milk-shakes. So there.
- Hyphens.
- Punctuation in general, even if I abuse it horribly.
- My health.
- Words.
- People.
- Old Navy. It's actually a problem. A delightful, brightly-colored problem with clean lines and thoughtful design.
- My family.
- My dog.
- Music.
- My friends. Even the ones that make me want to pull my own hair out. They keep it interesting.
- Dark, hoppy beer.
- Ramen noodles.
- Love.

Obviously this is just a random assortment. I'm thankful for basically everything in my life, even the inconveniences and complications. It builds character, and I am all about character development.

***

EDIT: I've taken this story down in the hopes that I can get it published. Thanks for the wonderful comments on it, you guys are awesome.

Window

Portland Chinese Gardens, January 2009

what I'm telling you is

So. That happened.

I've been struggling a little, with what I want to say here since. I've opened the post window several times over the last few weeks, only to stare at it for a while before closing it and walking away. I don't have a problem being trite and zany on Facebook or Twitter. That's my stream of consciousness; that's what flies out of my mouth during a conversation.

And now, nothing seems important enough to blog about. But I want to tell anyone who will listen.

Should I tell you about how I saw a man cradling a paper crane in his hand on the elevator? Or the fire extinguisher that was just sitting in the middle of the sidewalk outside of my office yesterday? Should I tell you about the countless trips I've made to the lab because of the swine flu testing my office does? How about the time that I got the wrong salad dressing? Or when I went the whole day with my shirt inside-out?

None of it means a damn thing. And that's okay. We're okay. I'm okay. We buried Ina on a Thursday, and I wore purple.

There's always more story to tell.

And, you know what, World? You crazy, magnificent mess of humanity? I love you. Every single one of you.

<3

Ina.

Ines Fazlic, my goofiest, nuttiest friend.

How can you erase the thousand little strands that connect you with someone? A hundred instant messenger conversations and photos and text messages. Inside jokes for days and days.

She said outloud things that everyone was thinking to themselves. She told me once that it's okay, it's okay to be who I am. And she was absolutely and unapologetically who she was.

She was a life. She was a beautiful, vibrant life. And she's gone now, and all we can do is remember her.

Ina, I will know who you are forever. <3

Stargate: Universe

My thoughts on SGU, or as I've been referring to it, "Battlegate Galactica":

Ugghhhhhhhhh. Look. Okay. There is a fucking reason that Stargate enchanted viewers for twelve goddamn years. It was witty and bright and a goddamn joy to watch. It didn't need to be pretentious and dark and dramatic.

There was great drama, don't get me wrong, but it wasn't constant ridiculous drama. It was charming and fun, and it knew when to be serious about things. And that wasn't every minute all the time.

I miss the tone of the very first episode of of SG-1. I miss the background music, with the trumpets and the familiar theme.

I miss Stargate. This is not Stargate. This is "darker and grittier" for the sake of being dark and gritty. It doesn't bring any improvement. The formula didn't need to be improved. It has no sense or feel of the original.

This is just a science fiction show that has a gate in it.

All of that being said, and despite the inappropriate sex as character introduction [STARGATE NEVER NEEDED TO HAVE GRAPHIC SEX OKAY. IT USED INNUENDO AND SUBTEXT. GAWD.] I really like Lieutenant Scott.

But he's no Cam Mitchell.

So, Stargate: Universe, I'm putting you on warning. You've got three episodes to make me fall in love with you, and that's two more than SG-1 and SGA ever needed put together.

And that's what I have to say about that.

My morning, let me show you it.

Lester woke me up this morning about... 4:45? Ish? He was coughing, and as he's got a history of Congestive Heart Failure, I jumped up and gave him an extra dose of his diuretic. We settled down again for a little while to let that get to work, maybe fifteen minutes, and then we went outside.

So, I step outside, and Lester goes off to make his rounds [base of porch stairs, neighbors cactus plant, edge of yard, tree, round the corner to the back yard] when some movement across the street catches my eye. I am hyper-aware at this point because it is 5AM and all sorts of nonsense can happen at 5AM, see.

WELL, THERE WAS NONSENSE GOING ON IN A CAR. There were two people in there, doing UNSPEAKABLE THINGS. And I'm not talking satanic baby-eating rituals. Well, one of them was eating something, but THAT IS NOT THE POINT. If you can't do it in a BED at FIVE IN THE MORNING, you probably shouldn't be doing it. Unless you're super-into kinky car sex, and then well, bon chance to you, friend. Good luck with the public lewdness.

Anyway, they got interrupted when two dudes strolled down the sidewalk on their side of the street, and they did a HILARIOUS impression of nonchalance. Then they stuck around for a few more minutes, presumably to right clothing and whatnot, and then took off.

Meanwhile, back at camp, Lester was done doing his business and we went back inside. Tried going back to bed for a bit, but he kept coughing, so I made an Executive Decision and took him up to Falls Road Animal Hospital, since it's the only one open at FIVE IN THE MORNING.

Got there [after getting turned around TWICE], they fussed over his cuteness appropriately, and did some diagnostic Stuff. I sat around and read my Regency Romance novel, and tried not to fret too hard.

The vet came back in and said basically, "Yep, he's old."

So, he got his Lasix upped, and added a new heart med [which I am having trouble finding online...], and we'll just see how he does with that. I'll make an appointment to see his real vet tomorrow afternoon. He's quiet a nice dog, and I hope they'll let me keep him a while longer.

<3

Vacation follow-up

So, I didn't take a single picture, as I've mentioned before, but my friends did [and did well], so here's a peek at theirs:

Lindley's post and photostream .

And a picture of me reading [I did that a lot] by Don:

I call it "Creepy stalker photo in Sepia". I think it's funny, though. Jamaila talks a bit more about our doings on this post.

I can't get over how green and lush it was. I love Garrett County.

Guest Posting!

I did a food guest post on Zaftig Chicks!

CHECK ME OUT, YO!

Freud's got nothin' on me...

I dreamed last night that I was at my parents’ church and that I really wanted to paint my nails bright lime green, but so did everyone else. And while they were all fighting over a bottle of nail polish, I found another one under a pew [I don't know, either].

So, I sat there and happily painted my fingers and toes, and then Adam Savage from Mythbusters came up and asked me to go to a birthday party for a kid who used to be in my church youth-group when I was in middle school. I said sure and we headed out to the car. Along the way, we found Jamie Hyneman, and he was carrying a blow-torch [natch] and we all piled into my Jetta and took off. I turned around to say something over my shoulder to Jamie, and I saw that Tory Belleci had found his way into the car, too. So I made a crack about how this day was going to turn out completely awesome, and Tory got all excited and held out his hand for a high-five from Jamie. Jamie sort of ruffled his mustache and Tory was like, "All right!"

So, we make it back to my parents house and end up swimming through the door because their house was filled with water. It was apparently completely normal, and my dog was floating along in a giant shoe.

Jamie busted out the blow-torch again, and we all started welding a space-ship in my old bedroom.

Then I woke up because I had fallen asleep watching Stargate SG-1 and Teal'c and Cam were busting their way out of a Ha’tak.

Hi. I'm a nerd.

Also, I swear that this wasn't me.

glargle?

Well, that was a false-start. HA.

I have no idea what I was going to blog about, but apparently when you hit "enter" whilst in the subject field, you post! Good times!

Watching The Naughty Kitchen right now and I freaking LOVE Blythe Beck. I want to be her BFF.

Tonight I get to go and snorfle Little Dude Silas! He is the CUTEST DAMN KID ever. Seriously. I can only hope that, one day, my kid will be half as cute as Silas. He's getting to the roly-poly peanut stage, with sausage-link arms and the cutest little belly button.

I LOVE THAT KID. I can't wait for him to get big enough that we can go look for bugs and stuff. We can make sweet forts! I will introduce him to the fine art of snot rockets and armpit farts.

Good times.

Those Aztecs...

I've been very interested in Aztec mythology and divination lately. My favorite website is the Aztec Calendar.

Today's daysign is Xochitl, or Flower. I'm supposed to go for the gusto, apparently. I wish I had a helmet and cape like Calvin to do so, but I just have my handkerchief and a warm sweater.

I certainly feel gusto-y. Life lately has had many happenings rolled into an interesting few weeks. I went on vacation a few weeks ago in Garrett County. It was delightful and green and peaceful. I saw deer and rabbits and lots of lovely flowers. I bought a green teapot from an antique store in Oakland, and I am going to make myself a pot of Darjeeling after work. I didn't take a single picture there, but others did, so when they get posted to the internets, I will be sure to share them here.

I did take this on the way out. It was the prettiest drive, sun shining, my sunroof open to the breeze. A long drive is the perfect way to clear your head of nonsense.

I listened to World War Z on audio book.

So, I'm back, and ready for action.